A Canadian in China (Part 10)

As time passed, I got used to being alone again but never for a minute stopped missing Dave. He and I were in touch almost daily by email and by live chat with Yahoo messenger and windows messenger. Soon after leaving here, Dave got a webcam so I could now see him on the monitor. It wasn¡¯t until I saw him on the monitor in his uniform that I fully understood about his university. Remember, back when I first wrote about him, I thought that "maybe" he would become a cop after he finished university?? Well, I did not realize that here in China they have "police universities". If you want to become a cop and you are accepted by a police university, you will go there and study for 4 years during which time you wear the police uniform and you will graduate as a "full-blown" cop. What a shock it was for me to see him in his uniform on the webcam. There is a police university in each province but the one in Beijing is, apparently, the best and that, of course, is where my dear Dave is. He must, by necessity, be better than average to get accepted to the Beijing police university. He will graduate in June. I have never had a particular attraction or "fetish" for uniforms but, I must say, seeing my dear Dave in a police uniform seemed to make me love him even more...if it was possible to love him any more than I already did.

Dave came to my home during the first week in May. I would be finished school in June and would return home for the summer vacation. I was, in fact, finished on June 2nd...less than one month after Dave left here. Just before I returned to my home in Canada, Dave told me that he would come, again , to my home in the middle of August and would spend one or two weeks with me. WOW !!!!!! A week...maybe TWO !!! with the love of my life! I was so thrilled that I was already wishing that it was August and I hadn't even begun my holiday.

I did not have to be back here until Sept. 1st but, soon after arriving back home, I made my return arrangements for the middle of August¡­to return here to be with Dave. I was having a really great time and it was great to be back home but, the joy and happiness of being back home was spoiled by my burning desire for August to come and for me to be back in my home in China to be with Dave. I thought about him day and night, dreaming of what it would be like to be with him again...maybe for up to two weeks.

One day in July came the devastating news from Dave in an email. He advised me that his "practice" work (we would say "practicum") would begin on August 16th in a distant city. He would not be able to come to my home. Shear, utter devastation!!! Indescribable disappointment!!! How hard it was to not show my heart break to my friends and family. It was too late to change my flight to a later time. I must still return to China in the middle of August...two weeks before I had to be back. I could tell by the many emails that Dave felt just as terrible and just as disappointed.

I had had a long time at home and so was quite ready to come back home to China on August 14th. It was good to be back but I was still so utterly disappointed at not being with Dave. It was hot back at home and, luckily, I have a good friend with whom I could go to the beach with. We went almost daily...drinking beer and swimming a bit. The time went by very pleasantly though I missed Dave every second and ached to be with him.

School started again. It was fun to be back in school and really wonderful to see all the kids again and to start meeting the new kids. I really love the students, very, very much. It is this love for the students that makes me love my job here so much. Luckily I have a couple of good buddies who love to drink beer so I have friends to go out with. I do love to go out for a beer or two after work and I do this almost every day. Of course I miss Dave every waking moment of every day. Fortunately we are in touch very frequently.

One day Dave wrote an email telling me that he would have more than a week off for the National Day holiday in October and that he hoped he would be able to come to my home again. I, too, would have more than a week off. I was extremely excited about the prospect of him coming again but was much more cautious this time. He was even farther away than Beijing and I really did not want to get my hopes up too high because I didn¡¯t want to go through the terrible disappointment that I went through in July. A couple days later, he told me that he had bought his bus ticket and that he was actually leaving the next day and that he would be able to spend 5 days with me. It seemed like he would really come and so I became very, very excited again.

Last year, uncertain at first as to how long I would stay here, I spent very little on my apartment so it never looked very warm or even very lived in. This year, knowing I would be here at least another year, I had decided to get a few things...starting with some drapes for the living room and my bedroom. I got some beautiful wall decorations, clock, pictures, large floor plants (artificial) etc. etc. I ran around for two days getting these things before Dave would arrive. I did it!! The place was transformed into a real home...and all done before Dave arrived.

You know how we often remember people, places and things and build up the memories in our minds to more than we should. And, when we see the people, or the places, or the things again we are often a bit disappointed as the reality does not live up to our memories??? Well, I feared this would happen with Dave. Had his absence made my memories of him greater than they should be? Would I be as happy with seeing him again and being with him again as I imagined?? Or, would seeing him be a bit of a "let down" or a bit disappointing??? This was a real fear and, as the time for his arrival drew nearer, I got more and more excited and apprehensive. This would only be the second time to actually see him and to be with him.

My fears were totally unfounded. I could not believe it!!! When I saw him again, in my home, I lifted him off the floor and held him for sooo long and kissed, and kissed and kissed. I stared and stared at him in disbelief...that we were together again!!!!! It didn¡¯t seem possible but, sure enough, I felt my love for him getting even still greater. MY GOD !!!! I HAVE NEVER LOVED LIKE THIS!!!! It was so glorious to have him in my home, in my arms and then...of course...in my bed!!!!

Remember I wrote about the glorious "love juice". Remember that it was not until I began to love Dave that I could take, swallow and savor ¡°cum¡±. Not until Dave could I ever do this. Now, I hungered, so much, to taste him again and this time, I tasted him so much more than the last time. It was heavenly. I could never get enough of him.

Also, remember way back when I wrote a bit about myself? The guilt I felt after anything sexual?? I wrote that I could never do anything anal. I could not fuck nor could I be fucked. I could not even touch another person¡¯s anus. I thought that that one part of the body is really gross and not to be touched...the part where shit passes through...what is more gross than shit??? What I liked doing the most was just sucking cock and getting sucked, of course. Well, you guessed it. What a difference love makes!!!!

I love sucking Dave and he seems to like sucking me at the same time. We do not always use the "69" position. Often Dave will straddle me with his knees on either side of my chest while he sucks me and I suck him. Of course, in this position, while I am sucking his beautiful, perfect cock and balls, I am looking at his anus. For the first time in my life an anus is beginning to look very interesting and Dave¡¯s, of course, is the most attractive with two perfect little tufts of hair on either side of his tiny, tight and dry anus. I began to explore it a bit with my finger¡­just touching it. I would then put my finger to my nose... to check. You see, I don¡¯t think I could handle any odor and I always thought that, no matter how clean we may be, there will always be some odor from an anus. I was certain that I would not like this. I have seen ¡°rimming¡± in pictures and videos and was always ¡°grossed out¡± by it. I could never understand how anyone could put his face into another person¡¯s crack and, even harder to understand how anyone could actually put his tongue into another¡¯s person¡¯s ass hole. WHAT A DIFFERENCE LOVE MAKES !!!

Dave's perfect little hole is totally clean and dry. I inserted my finger a little¡­checked again. I played a little more and a little more, all the time thinking that this ass, this crack, this hole, belongs to my beloved Dave. How could I not love every single part of his body?? I put my face to his crack...then ventured out with my tongue. Low and behold!!!!!!!!!!! It was great!!!!!I loved it !!!!!. Until Dave I could not swallow and enjoy cum. Until Dave, I could not even contemplate ¡°rimming¡± someone¡¯s ass hole. Until Dave I could not fondle someone else¡¯s toes for fear of some odor from between the toes. But with Dave, I even love each of his toes and love to fondle and caress them when he is stretched out on the couch with his legs across my lap. How much I love this guy!!!!

The five days with Dave flew by so quickly. It was a truly perfect time. He continues to prefer cooking at home to going out so he cooked each night. I was his assistant. He is really a very excellent cook. We spent most of the time at home but went out each day just to shop a bit for groceries and have a beer or two. Dave drinks very little but will have one beer and occasionally a little more. Every day was very, very romantic and beautiful.

There is another first with my dear Dave. Before Dave, I could never understand monogamy. I really couldn¡¯t. I could never see how two people could enjoy sex only with each other for years and years and years¡­.like my own parents for example. I know they were totally faithful to each other and that they had a very active sex life¡­right until my father died. I could never see what two people could see in each other after years and years. Now, knowing and loving Dave as I do, I can appreciate having only one lover. All past sex experiences now seem so empty and so meaningless, not really a whole lot better than jerking off, compared to sex with someone you really love.

All this talk about sex being meaningless without love was all a bunch of bull shit to me¡­.until I met Dave. All I ever knew before was simply physical¡­.sucking a nice cock, a one night stand (or less as was often the case with me). Now, I know Dave. Now, I truly love someone. What a difference. Dave¡¯s whole body is more exciting to me now than it was when I first met him. Dave¡¯s whole body is more exciting and more meaningful to me than any strange handsome guy¡¯s could be. Yes, of course I still notice beautiful, handsome and cute guys¡­.all the time!!! But, the desire for them is diminished when I think of the love I have for Dave. I imagine having sex with some gorgeous guy and I find my mind going always to Dave. I just know that if I did have sex with another guy it would be meaningless and demeaning now¡­now that I know real love.

I hate that Dave is so far away. We hope to get together again in January during Spring Festival time. He will graduate in the Spring and we will, hopefully get together again then. He tells me he will look for work close to me. I dream of him actually getting a job in the same town as I and we live together. When he graduates, he will be a policeman qualified to work anywhere in China. He tells me that it is easy to land a job especially for graduates of the Beijing police university which is actually called something like: ¡°The Peoples Public Safety and Security University¡±.

Dave traveled by bus to be with me. It was a 25 hr. bus ride. I could not have my dear love Dave riding a bus again for 25 hrs. so I bought him an air ticket to return to the city where he was doing his practicum. It was his first time to fly.

Once again I had to say good bye to my sweetheart. I didn¡¯t think it could be harder than the first time but¡­..it was!! It was devastating and the tears were so much greater than the first time I had to say good bye. Again, I could not stand to be in my apartment with him gone. Everywhere I looked, I could see him¡­how I hated this loneliness.

Dave has now been gone for almost a month and he is finished his ¡°practicum¡± and is now back in Beijing. We are in touch by email, messenger and phone almost daily. His voice makes me so lonely. I count the days till we can be together again, hopefully in January.