Alone Among Friends

George was sitting there on his bed thinking about the night. He hadn't drunk too much alc for he wanted to remember every bit he had shared with Kaneda. Even if it was something very innocent, like a mutual laugh, a smile with him, or a dance like earlier. He was thinking about their dance in the club and how Kaneda's gaze had pierced trough his mind. Was that a sign? Kaneda was -so he felt- staring at him trough- out the dance. He felt so good while dancing with Kaneda and sure had a hard one in his pants. At the dancefloor he cussed himself for wearing those pants which would easily bend and show an enmormous bulge. The CK- underwear he wore wasn't a help either to disguise his growing dick. But he had luck, for it was rather dark back then and he hadn't to worry about Kaneda seeing the outlines of his 7" incher trough the pants. Right now he could feel his manhood growing again at the sweet thought of having Kaneda close to him; Georg's hand moved slowly downwards and touched the bulge in his pants. It felt damn good. He closed his eyes and thought Kaneda would be touching his best part and the fabric of his underwear was making the feeling even more intense.

With his eyes closed and stroking his shaft softly and slowly trough the fabrics, he imagined Kaneda's almond eyes, his cute face, his hair and his seductive smile. He could not help it no more, he was getting crazy.

He loved this guy over everything. He thought again that Kaneda was staring at him in the club, or did he just have the feeling that he was? He wasn't sure and he didn't think that his crush would end at all. Georg, trying to enlongate these sweet feelings and thoughts went over to his computer and fired his MP3-player up. The program was set on 'shuffle-mode' and Chris Isaak started to sing 'wicked game' where he always felt that Isaak was whining too much in his songs.
But this time this 'whining' made Georg feel depressed.

"Damn!" he said, with a croaky voice which sounded as if he was about to cry. He was feeling lonely, so damn lonely in his room. Georg's mood for a jerk off went away and he wanted to be with someone, to be with Kaneda.

He was sitting there, with his face in his hands and crying softly. He could not take it no more, it was more than he was able to bear. Georg was thinking about telling Kaneda what he felt, but he feared, oh yes, he really feared that Kaneda would slowly cease friendship with him; that the friendship would change in a way or that Kaneda would turn out to be not as gay-tolerant as he claimed to be for he never met a gay guy yet. What he definitely feared was that he would loose his friendship with him.

"Kaneda.. I love you, damnit man, I love you...," Georg said and started to cry even more, sobbing like a child into his hands not knowing what to do.